I apologize for not posting for quite some time - it's been a busy couple days. Over the weekend I painted the entire basement a gleaming bright white. I thought it would only take me 8 hours, but the bright orange faux-finished hallway into the basement disagreed.
Two days and four coats of paint later the basement looks brighter. I'm not sure the final product was worth the work; oh well, it's a sunk cost at this point.